Raise the Roof

Well the wind started comin' and the Washington rain made it's way to our 5 acres. For several days we went down to the coop, and found that the blue tarp we temporarily put up for a roof was starting to sag and fill with water...
We knew we had to get the roofing on, but because of long work hours and fewer day light hours, we were running out of time.
I ordered 16 foot by 3 foot lengths of galvanized roofing from our precious hardware store Ace. Because of the size of the sheets, we had to have them delivered. (I decided 16 foot anything hanging out of the back of our truck should be a once in a lifetime thing, and we had already done that once.) Our favorite Ace employee Aaron, (the one who keeps promising us our own parking space,) was the one to make the delivery...he had been curious about seeing our "chicken coop" after the dozens of trips we had made into his store collecting odds and ends...insisting it was all for the chickens.
Well...we weren't there when he made the delivery....but when we saw him the next time at Ace, he fondly referred to it as the bomb shelter.... He said he was impressed, and then looked at Patty and jerked his head toward me, "She really likes those treated 2x12s doesn't she?" P just rolled her eyes in agreement...
Bomb shelter huh? Well I considered that a huge compliment!!!
A few days later, after work, we got one of the pieces up. Considering the run is 10 ft tall at it's highest point, we had to bust out the big ladder. The girls didn't like the ladder in their run, and it ruffled them enough that they started laying their eggs outside! One minute nothing would be there, and the next, a damn egg. So we let them run around outside to forage while we took on the roof.
After the first piece went up, it was obvious that our glorious chicken run wasn't exactly square...(I know, we were shocked too!) For the sheet to line up on the side, it was crooked hanging off the bottom edge. The right side hung off about a half inch, and the left side hung off about 2 inches. Well that's kind of close right? So we continued. Fortunately the sheets weren't heavy but it was absolutely pouring! P was up on the ladder screwing the sheets into the 2x6s, and I was holding the ladder, helping with the extension cord, handing up hardware or standing outside of the coop, holding the sheet. Which was awesome because it was like standing at the bottom of a waterslide....all of the water flying off the roof and landing in my mouth, my face, or down my shirt.
Well, as we all know from past experiences, P's patience went down the toilet by the end of the first sheet. I don't blame her really...she had the shitty job, and the fact that the sheets weren't lining up square pissed her off even more. (I thought it added a modern art look to the run...which didn't help matters either.) It was at about this point that some forest sprites joined in just to see how bad they could %&@$ with us...
By this time we were about half way done...it was getting dark...absolutely pouring...and P would get to the top of her ladder, and her drill would unplug from the extension cord...or we would go to move the tarp over to slide another sheet up, and it would release gallons of water on us...or she would go to screw something in, and the screw would fly off the end of the drill and off into the dark. At one point P came flying backwards off her ladder, and I was able to catch her enough that she landed on her feet but she still jarred her back. It was literally pitch black at this point, and the deluge, (As Bear Grylls would say,) was not letting up. We were working by a small lantern.
We went to put the last piece on...and how unsquare our Taj Mahal is was crystal clear. At the bottom it was flush, and at the top it seemed to hang off a foot and a half. That can't be right can it?! I had to move the ladder around outside of the run so P could get the last piece up. Well, for anyone that knows the "Little Giant", they are great, but heavier than hell. So in the dark I tried to maneuver the wet ladder around to the other side. I opened it up to about 12 feet, and tried to bring it upright...At this point P was past her threshhold, and left whatever ounce of patience she had left in the coop. She watched me lift the ladder, and watched as it started to come down for me... I must have squeaked or something because she helped grab it just as my head made it through one of the spaces and it came crashing down on my shoulder. Fortunately...it didn't hurt as much then as it did later...
We managed to get the last piece up by enough screws that it would hold until daylight. We closed everything up, made sure all of the chickens were safe and sound and headed back up to the car. We were both soaked, dirty, in pain and grouchy.
Eat that Bear Grylls....